you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
