To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
