youre lurking in front of me
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
im calling her cock vulture from now on
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
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