Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
