Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize