doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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