yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
