But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
