your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I am available for nakedness
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
