how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
i think i scared a bird with my dick
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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