I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
