You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
