Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize