Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize