i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
