the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
