Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
