Nicole vs. Life
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
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