Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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