the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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