She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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