I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
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