So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
