if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
You took a bar mat shot.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
