But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
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