Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
