D3 body, D1 cock
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Randomize
