he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
