I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
