whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
i will never coherently bang her
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
