Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I have already put on my inside pants.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
