he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
