So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
