i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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