"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I wish they made helmets for livers.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize