I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize