I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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