shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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