You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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