Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
they're like a gay fantastic four
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
