I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
