I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
