Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize