I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize