Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize