My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
