Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Randomize
