so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
