She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
