She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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