2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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