Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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