R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
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